Archives for posts with tag: New Jersey

“Anthony Bourdain Parts Unknown” visits New Jersey, but then hits all the crappy parts known.

Ok, so from the second video we’ve learned that Walter L. Scott had not yet purchased the car he was driving, and had no insurance card or vehicle registration on him. I guess it’s not allowed in North Carolina, but here in New Jersey that’s grounds to be shot dead on sight and then have your insurance premiums raised by 300%. Happened to me twice.

What’s up with Gov. Christie? He’s doing it all wrong. Here’s what you do now:

1. Stay in NJ for the rest of your term. Never leave NJ.
2. Stay in NJ for the rest of your term. Never leave NJ.
3. Be the best Governor New Jersey has ever seen.
4. Be the best Governor the US has ever seen.
5. Fix the traffic on I-287, (see #3).
6. Give the NJ Democratic Party something it desperately wants.
7. Write a book outlining your vision of governance and your vision of what you think is the best way to run a state and the US.
8 Give interviews and press conferences to anyone who asks.
9. Since you say you didn’t know about Bridgegate, do your own investigation about it and take the necessary steps to make sure something like it never happens again. Fire people, put new systems or policies into place, reorganize the org-chart and such as required. And do this out in the open, fully transparent, and update the public as you go and as things turn up.
10. Reform the Part Authority as much as possible as the Governor of NJ.
11. Stop running for president, or at least stop making it so damn obvious!
12. (optional) Cut property taxes. Again. Noting make a Jersey person happier!

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