Archives for the month of: April, 2015


Hey Facebook & Internet: spreading the truth is not spreading negativity!  If you have your facts wrong about vaccines and GMOs and you get called out on it, that’s your bad!  The truth often hurts; deal with it.

Recently there’s appeared this strange breed of posters that feel that spreading awareness, even if it’s spreading pseudoscience and misinformation, is the ultimate in positivity, and that anyone who challenges them with facts is a hater.  One does not need to be a scientist to think scientifically, we all had science classes in regular K-12 school.  Didn’t folks learn to do basic, rudimentary scientific & scholarly research?  I don’t know how an average, intelligent person, or even a less than average intelligent person, hasn’t learned to evaluate a source and to consult more than one source.  Or to simply consider alternative possibilities.

I love it (hate it) when you point out to a person that they have their facts wrong and they say “well you’re no scientist!” when they themselves aren’t one either yet felt they had enough knowledge of a scientific topic to feel they could speak as an authority on it.

So confusing, what ever happened to healthy skepticism?

All through my life I’ve routinely tested as having average intelligence; I’m no genius not by a nautical mile.  But I did learn how to learn, I do know how to do the most basic separation of fact from fallacy.  Which is FUCKING EASY AS SHIT TO DO!  It’s actually harder and takes more cognitive gymnastics (and precious time) to believe in falsehoods.  What gives?  I do not get it.

And love-hate, positivity-negativity binaries do not apply to fact gathering anyway, let alone the scientific method.

There’s heat in the kitchen, not just cupcakes.

People are saying Rubio gave an amazing presidential campaign announcement speech.  WTF?  It sucked ass.  I heard it live.   His speech was depressing.  He made it seem that it’s impossible for children to have a better life than their parents these days.  And it’s all just government’s fault and not anyone else’s, not greedy rich people or wage-stingy corporations.  Wait, I take that back, apparently universities with their high tuition are a huge part of the problem as well.  No mention at all that poverty breeds poverty and that wealth breeds wealth.  Just government and universities, those are the sources of all of America’s problems.  If only those two things would just get out of the way we would all succeed!  We’d all be able to start successful businesses and become insanely wealthy in a matter of a couple of days or so.  If it weren’t for those fucking universities and governments keeping us down!  The revolution starts now: vote Rubio and get participatory democracy and higher education off your back.

He also seemed to indicate that only a person raised by poor immigrant Cubans should ever be allowed to become a US president, because only they know what hard work is.

Anyone else notice that the acting on Game of Thrones sucks? All the actors have blank faces and dead looking eyes. Like robots and avatars. Every line of the script is delivered in a slow monotone with that stupid pseudo British accent that’s supposed to make us think we’re watching Shakespeare rather than just dragons and dungeons. The only emotion ever shown is pain, physical pain. No one cracks a joke, ever. Not a funny one anyway. Political maneuvering is supplanted for actually character development, which makes GOT as thrilling as TiVo-ing Mitt Romney stump speeches. Who’s writing this thing? Apparently each episode costs a billion dollars to make, but they’re letting the interns and Teamsters write it. Which explains all the Skinemax style softcore porn. GOT is all costumes, hair, makeup, sets. Kudos to those guilds however, bravo! The alcoholic midget is the only character that reminds you of an actual human being. Friends, I can’t do it, I tried. I watched a bunch of episodes yesterday. I’m giving up on Game of Yawns. It’s like Nickelback for music: why listen to them when you can listen to Led Zeppelin? Also, extreme, line-crossing violence has never captured my attention and I don’t seek it out for entertainment. Rape and infant stabbings? No thanks HBO.  Since everyone else is watching I’m sure you won’t mind if I pass. But True Detective can’t start soon enough!

Ok, so from the second video we’ve learned that Walter L. Scott had not yet purchased the car he was driving, and had no insurance card or vehicle registration on him. I guess it’s not allowed in North Carolina, but here in New Jersey that’s grounds to be shot dead on sight and then have your insurance premiums raised by 300%. Happened to me twice.

My new POLITICAL HYPOTHESIS: America’s evolution from an isolationist country that stayed out of foreign affairs and wars to a much more belligerent nation that always wants to fight in other people’s wars aligns perfectly with America’s switch of national pastime from baseball to football.

Baseball is more of a game of strategy, more closely mimicking diplomacy, less about gaining and taking ground. Football is nearly the opposite: it’s all about brute force and taking territory away from you foe.

Back in the late 1930s America was obsessed with baseball. And we had no taste for or desire to stop fascism in both Europe and Asia. “That’s their problem” was our collective stance. But nowadays with football dominating American sports viewership and fandom, we’re all set to use our military, or strongly consider using our military, for any little conflict no matter where it is on the globe (especially if there’s oil involved!).

Maybe if we start watching more basketball we’ll strike a happy medium?


Adam: I’m hungry I’m going to head over to the grove and grab a peach, you want one?
Eve: The grove, huh?
Adam: Yes.
Eve: Or you could go over to the garden and get some greens and we can make a salad.
Adam: I’m starving though, I just want to grab a quick peach.
Eve: Ok, get some grapes and a banana, we can share.
Adam: I don’t like bananas.
Eve: That’s ok, you can just have half of mine.
Adam: I said I don’t like bananas.
Eve: Who doesn’t like bananas?
Adam: I don’t.  And we’re the only ones here.
Eve: How about we try that new spot beyond the garden and we can get some kale and quinoa?
Adam: I just really want a peach, been craving one all day.  And the grove is a lot closer than the garden.
Eve: Ok, ok.  The grove it is.  Why not apples from that new tree, they look delicious I’ve been wanting to try one of those.
Adam: The tree with the huge forbidden sign it front of it?
Eve: That’s the one.  Get one big apple and we can share.
Adam: Or I can get two regular size apples and we can each have our own.  Or peaches.
Eve: I think I’m in more of a mood for apple.  And I’ve been wanting to try one of the forbidden apples, they look exotic and yummy.
Adam: But I distinctly remember God telling us those apples are forbidden.
Eve: Nah, he only meant that as a suggestion.
Adam: I’m pretty sure he didn’t.
Eve: That’s your problem Adam, you never want to try anything new.
Adam: I know what I like.
Eve: So get a big apple, my new friend the serpent says they’re amazing, really scrumptious, “to die for” is how she put it.  She seems really cool I want to start hanging out with her more.
Adam: I don’t know …
Eve: Oh come on, live a little for once.
Adam: Alright, alright I’ll get us a big forbidden apple to share if it will make you happy.
Eve: Thanks honey, you’re the best!
Adam: You want honey too?

Here’s the thing: If baking a cake for a gay couple violates your strongly held religious beliefs, then you didn’t have strong religious beliefs in the first place.  True religious faith is inviolable.

(Also, nothing’s more gay than baking wedding cakes, cupcakes, and red velvet cake all day long.  #InDenial  Go MIG weld some flat bar ya fag!)

%d bloggers like this: